From The Proofreader's Desk

Three random things I've seen so far today: 

(1)

Using the wrong type of person in the wrong place (possibly at the wrong time too, but that would make it a Bruce Willis film). Here are the correct associations (with some bonus info):

theatres and cinemas attract audiences. They stage plays and screen or show films (respectively), each of which are based on scripts,

sporting events, (everything from football matches to the Olympics) have spectators,

events, spectacles* draw crowds,

music festivals, rock/pop etc concerts – crowds,

opera halls, symphonies – also audiences. 

Note the action verbs – theatres stage plays; cinemas show films (at film festivals and certain other competitive or unique events, like Kraków’s awesome Film Music Festivals, they’re called screenings).

* Calling something a spectacle is really quite archaic, I mean like we’re going back to e19 or whenever it was coined and put in the dictionary. For any spectacles you find (!), use events instead. Same thing for actions, although that can vary a bit. We’ll give actions its own space another time.

(2)

(a) The Polish production was competing in the category with such well-known series as Doctor Who, Lost or Human Target.

(b) The Polish production was competing in the category with such well-known series as Doctor Who, Lost and Human Target.

Remember what we said here – no or at the end of a list unless it’s a list of choices!

(3)

As part of a discussion thread on a poll posted at proz.com on the subject of the intriguing-sounding “Muphry's Law”, proz member Mustafa ER said:

“Muphry's law is an adage that states that "if you write anything criticizing editing or proofreading, there will be a fault of some kind in what you have written". The name is a deliberate misspelling of ‘Murphy's law’.”

This is certainly something I’ve fallen prey to myself many times (I blame my gigantic sausage-like fingers), and reminds me of something  funny that happened yesterday during a stress-relieving  game of Battlefield online: Driving a tank, I chased an enemy soldier around a beach for a good few minutes while he desperately tried to blow me up with grenades before I squashed him like one of teściowa’s gołąbki. Finally, with my tank’s armour at almost zero, I crushed him under my tracks like a piece of MultiKino popcorn.

Moments later, the individual in question broadcast across the open chat channel: ‘You can kill me in a tank! Ha!’ To which I replied, ‘Yes, I’m rather good at that aren’t I?’ :D